I had a cathartic moment one night this week.
Just in case you’re unfamiliar with the word “catharsis”, it means “the process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions.”
The short of my backstory is that 2025 has not gone the way I hoped it would or even thought it should. Instead of growing into fulfillment, I have found thing after thing I expected to happen being stripped away. The end result has left me disheartened, frustrated, and deeply sad. I have felt straight-up lost at times.
What my cathartic moment entailed was the realization that I’d actually rather be wandering in the desert this season than to have caved and remained in a toxic situation.
I also realized that I’m not actually lost. I just haven’t arrived yet.
Arrived at what? Well, I guess whatever is the next part of my journey. Out there is a door that is waiting for me to arrive outside it so it can swing open. The catch is that the door won’t open unless I’m the right version of myself to be able to handle what’s on the other side.
The title of this post is borrowed from a story I hold dear to my heart, the Lord of the Rings saga by J.R.R. Tolkien. Within the pages, there is a short poem that describes one of the characters you meet in the story, Aragorn son of Arathorn. The poem goes like this:
All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
~J.R.R. Tolkien
If you are unfamiliar with the story, let me give this particular character in a nutshell. Aragorn is destined to be king of Gondor, but as a child, his mother hides him for a while. When he is old enough to learn who he really is, he shuns that path and strikes out on his own to wander the world. As the Lord of the Rings unfolds, Aragorn is drawn into a quest to aid a young hobbit in taking a mighty ring of power to the one place it can be destroyed, and thus save the world from evil. Along the way, Aragorn faces trials that show him his proper place is stepping out of the shadows of anonymity and into the mantle of the crown. The poem foretells the ascent of Aragorn to the crown, but you may encounter the line “not all those who wander are lost” on bumper stickers, shirts, and coffee mugs as well–and plenty of those people probably have no idea where it actually originates.
The lesson I take from Aragorn’s story is that while his destiny was to be king, he actually was a better king because he took a longer path to reach the crown. He met all kinds of people who lived in the world he would rule, and instead of being above them, he first was humble enough to be one of them. He learned humility in the ashes, compassion in the shadows.
Now. The Lord of the Rings is a fantasy saga, though there are pieces that certainly are allegorical in nature (meaning a story, poem, or picture that can be interpreted to reveal a hidden meaning, typically a moral or political one). The Bible, a book of true stories, contains characters who have a similar starting point in their lives.
- Moses: he started as a baby in a basket in the river, then was raised as a prince. But he disagreed with the treatment of the Israelites and killed an Egyptian, which made him flee Egypt. He spent the next 40 years herding sheep in the desert in total anonymity, before God called him out of the desert and to his true purpose–to lead Israel to freedom. (His story can be found in the book of Exodus, starting in chapter 2.)
- Joseph: one of 12 brothers, he had extraordinary dreams that caused his brothers to be jealous and sell him into slavery while faking his death to cover their deed. Joseph was a slave, rose through the ranks, went to prison when falsely accused of a crime, and ended up in Pharaoh’s household as second-in-command of all Egypt. God raised him up through a series of rises and falls to eventually save Egypt and his own family from famine (His story can be found in Genesis 37-50).
These are just two examples, but our God has a way of bringing His chosen ones through shadows and ashes before raising them to their intended task. And it’s not any different for our lives, it’s just harder for us to see.
I haven’t arrived yet, but like Aragorn, Moses, and Joseph, I’m not lost. I believe the calling God placed on my life is still valid, and every step forward will bring me closer to becoming the person I need to be to walk through that door that I’ll find down the road. There are still shadows I need to walk through. There are still ashes I will rise from. And each part is important to the process–even when it isn’t fun.
I’m not lost. I just haven’t arrived yet.
And friend, I believe the same applies to you. Keep going.
Blessings,
~Lynne
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